Collateral beauty

“We’re here to connect. Love, time, death. Now these three things connects every single human being on earth. We long for love, we wish we had more time, and we fear death” – Allan Loeb

They say there is beauty and love within dark and ugly places. They say that beauty and love continues even through pain, fear and anger. I can see why people say this. We end up seeing a profound realisation that we learn valuable lessons.

Every experience we encounter is to improve our lives in one way, shape or form. They teach us strength, courage, determination and wisdom.

When I started writing this blog it was for personal growth, to really listen to how I was feeling and learn to communicate it in a way that enabled me to acknowledge and learn from it. As I continue this path I can see how much I have grown to understand how we connect with people and most importantly, connect with myself.

7 months ago I hit a crisis point that tore me apart. It shook my reality. It distorted everything I believed in. I went to a hypnotist to make my pain go away. As I continued to see this lady I ended up realising that I needed to understand myself a little better. And that, was collateral beauty. In the pain I was feeling, I found myself. My true self. My best self. I finally understood who I was as a person.

Contrary to popular belief, soul mate relationships are not the easiest. They are difficult because the significant other teaches us to grow and to evolve so that we can become our highest, best self, but the issue with that is timing. My most valuable lesson has been to understand time.

Time has a wonderful way of showing us what matters, it doesn’t make us forget the pain we have felt but it makes us grow and understand life and situations a little more.

We seek guidance from friends or family who are always around us, but I’ve learnt that people won’t understand it until it happens to them. We cannot make everyone think and feel as deeply as we do. Not everyone is going to understand me like I understand them. And that’s ok.

After re-reading my daily affirmation journal I am seeing that I never say I regret my bad days. My good days give me happiness, my bad days give me experience, my worse days teach me lessons and the best days give me memories.



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